Women Who Sweat Together Reach Goals Together!

empowering women in sport

I’ve never been someone who loves exercise. I’d always wanted to be a sporty type, competitive and fit, ready to jump on a surf board or smash it on the netball court, but that just wasn’t me. I didn’t play sport as a kid, my mother considered sport a punishing ordeal and I certainly inherited this aversion!

So it is a huge surprise to me that I’m getting up at 5.30am, before doing a days work, to exercise! If you knew me a few years ago you’d think I was possessed, because wild horses couldn’t drag me out of bed! In fact, I was the only student nurse to ever over sleep for a late shift! What’s changed you may well ask?

The Secret To Discover Motivation

I’ve found a secret ingredient that has changed my approach to exercise. All these years I believed exercise was about the grit, the cardio, the sweating and the active wear!  When I exercised I focused on all those things, got bored pretty quickly and continued to pay for a gym membership that didn’t see any use! If that sounds like a familiar story then maybe you’re a bit like me.

You see, it’s not the exercise that gets me up at 5.30 in the morning, it’s the people! The community of women who encourage, support and sweat together. The women who don’t care what my hair looks like, or whether my active wear is last seasons, last years or last decades! The women who count my 10 burpees, who say ‘just another one’  and push me to hold that plank just 10 seconds longer.

A Sense Of Belonging

All these years I’ve been focusing on the wrong thing when I work out, I’ve been focusing on the exercise, but really I should have been focusing on the people. What I’ve come to know is a sense of belonging in a non-judgmental fitness environment that pushes me harder than I have ever pushed myself before.

I may never love exercise for the sake of exercise, but I love the pursuit of shared goals with like-minded women. Over the next few months I’m going to be introducing some of the women who are part this community, sharing their stories, their triumphs and their reflections on living with passion and purpose.

Next week – meet Brooke, the winner of Advanced Finesses 6 week challenge, and hear the secret of her success!

Finding My Why

Mark manson quote 1I’ve been carrying around  an unwanted guest for about 10 years, and I’m over it!

The first time I noticed that cheeky hitch-hiker was after my first pregnancy. As a new Mum I was at home full-time, lonely and tired; food was a comforting staple when there was nobody to talk to.

I got used to bigger portions and regular cupboard cruising, and soon I was 7 kilos heavier. That unwelcome guest made itself known by rolling over the top of my jeans, forcing me out of a bikini and forming a spare tyre under my bra.

A second baby, 2 miscarriages and an international re-location invited a further 3 kilos to join the party; they felt right at home snuggling into my belly and thighs. I adjusted clothing sizes, styles and stopped trying things on at the shops; bright lights and multiple mirrors were no longer my friends!

And now here I am, 43 years old, adapting my life to suit that unwelcome guest; my extra 10 Kilos!

Living Together

I make that 10 Kilos feel very welcome, adjusting all sorts of things so she can live with me.

I walk instead of running to avoid jiggling too much, I wear stretch jeans to accommodate her and loose floaty tops to flatter her. In fact, we’ve really become friends; she’s a symbol of all those moments of happiness found in eating second helpings, saying yes to pudding and washing it down with plenty of wine. Why would I even want to get rid of her?

And there it is, the burning unanswered question; what’s my Why?

Changing My Why

Awareness precedes change

Calvin Coyles

I have made many attempts over the years to change, but I never identified my why. What was my inspiring reason to commit, to persist when it got tough and drive myself to achieve change? I’ve been working to discover my why, and it’s been a lot harder than I thought it would be.

My why, my purpose and my inspiration for the last 15 years has been my children. They are the light that brightens every day and the reason I get up in the morning. I am a Mum that has thrown myself into parenting, thriving on being needed. But I’m at a cross roads now; they don’t need me as much!

At 12 and 15 I’ve done my job well and they are confident happy people growing to independence. I’m proud of the young men they’re becoming, but I’m aware of a silence surrounding me. I hadn’t noticed it before because it was filled with children’s voices; asking for a story, clamoring for dinner, laughing with their friends.

In the silence after they go out for the day, I find what’s left of me.  And I’m not sure I like what I see.

I see someone who:

  • Snacks secretly in the pantry
  • Get’s undressed with the lights off
  • Hopes her husband doesn’t catch sight of her in the shower
  • Edits herself out of the family photo album
  • Holds her tummy in when looking in the mirror
  • Is horrified to see her reflection when she forgets to hold her tummy in!
  • Can’t remember the last time she felt good naked
  • Worries about wearing bathers in public
  • Stopped feeling sexy a long time ago

Yesterday an article by Mark Manson brought a new level of awareness to my thinking. He wrote about the lies we tell ourselves and it dawned on me; I can’t find my why until I recognise my lie.

What’s My Lie?

Instead of asking what’s my why, ask what’s my lie?

I spotted mine pretty quickly when I re-read this post.

I wrote that I’ve become friends with that extra 10 Kilos. How can I imagine calling this impostor a friend?

She’s hijacked my wardrobe, turned the lights out on my sex life and made me feel like a victim! I would never put up with that from a friend, and I WONT put up with it from her!

So I’m breaking up with her, we’re finished!

I know she won’t go easily, it’ll be a messy, but I’m determined to find the me I really want to be.

What’s My Why?

My why, my purpose, my inspiration is to lose weight and get fit:

  1. To feel sexy again – I want to feel confident, desirable and passionate
  2. To prove that I can change – I want to prove to myself that I can stick to something and make a change
  3. To feel proud of my photo in the family album – I want to see photos of me laughing, connecting and exploring with my family.

What’s your why?

Have you got a purpose that drives you? I’d love to hear your story in the comments.

 

Lisa is about to embark on a 6 week mind & body transformation, follow her  journey and read her reflections by signing up for weekly email updates.

Cuddle Fairy

Find this article at the Candid Cuddles link-up

Useful Links:

For more information on body transformation follow the link to Advanced Fitness.